Forehead Jokes And Puns

We think these funny forehead jokes and puns are the best, but we won’t let that go to our heads and become big-headed!

Funny Forehead Jokes

My wife got stung by a bee on the forehead.

She’s at the ER now, her face all swollen and bruised, she almost died.

Luckily I was close enough to hit the bee with my shovel.

My girlfriend has started using a pencil for her eyebrows.

Looks pretty ridiculous. Plus, it keeps falling off her forehead.

Doc, it hurts when I poke myself on the shoulder and when I poke myself on the forehead and when I poke myself in the thigh.

Doc: Your finger is broken.

A burglar broke into our house last night.

I didn’t shoot him.

I just put the red laser dot on his forehead.

Our three cats did the rest.

Do you know why so many Italian people are named Tony?

Years ago they were shipping a bunch of them into America and they stamped on their foreheads To:NY.

I bought my wife a mood ring.

When she’s happy it turns blue.

When she’s not happy it leaves a red mark on my forehead.

A pirate walks into the bar and the bartender just stares at him. There’s a paper towel stuck to his forehead. The pirate walks up, slams his hand on the counter and exclaims, “I need some rum!”

Ignoring the paper towel for now, the bartender complies. After a few more rounds, the pirate’s loud and obnoxious and having a great time in general.

At the request of the next round, the bartender complies once again, this time asking, “Alright, I just have to know. Are you aware there’s a paper towel stuck to your forehead?”

The pirate nods and sigh dejectedly. “Aye, I’ve got a bounty on me head.”

Why did the nose break up with the forehead?

Because it couldn’t handle the pressure.

What do you call an enormous forehead?

A fivehead.

Forehead Dad Jokes

When my wife was sleeping, I drew Mark Hamill on her forehead.

You should have seen the Luke on her face!

My forehead is very lenient with my eyebrows.

It gives them a lot of wiggle room.

Dogs don’t have foreheads.

They only have one, duh.

When I used to be a wrestler, I would get a guy in a head lock and write my name on their forehead.

It was my signature move.

Why did the blonde put lipstick on her forehead?

To make up her mind.

A quadriplegic man became famous playing beautiful piano classics with only his nose, ears, chin, and forehead.

Before going on stage to perform, his tour manager would say, “Alright John. It’s time to face the music.”

Someone just threw a bottle of Omega-3 and it hit my forehead.

I have super fish oil injuries.

I saw an article in the news claiming a cure for forehead wrinkles.

Talk about headline news.

My dad’s horse grew a horn out of its forehead after it ate this strange mutant maize.

It was a real unique corn.

Did you hear about the guy whose nose was upside down on his forehead?

He smelled funny.

I told my girlfriend she was drawing her eyebrows too high on her forehead.

She looked surprised.

I just saw a cow with one eye in the middle of its forehead.

I’ve never seen a cyclox before.

One time my math professor asked everyone in class to write a complex number on their forehead.

You could probably imagine the expressions on our faces.

Big Forehead Jokes & Insults

Your forehead is what happens when you keep your thoughts to yourself.

Why don’t you join the army? They could use your forehead as a landing spot for their helicopters.

That’s a $20 cab ride from your eyebrows to your hairline.

You look like someone drew a face on a balloon and then squeezed the bottom.

That’s not a forehead, that’s a forecourt.

Successfully climbing your forehead remains the biggest feat in the rock-climbing community.

I won’t say anything about your forehead. But I will say it looks like it’s hard for you to find a bike helmet that fits.

God loved you so much that he gave you one face and started clearing off space for another.

I wasn’t staring at you. I was trying to figure out if that is your forehead or the moon.

It would take Michaelangelo four years to complete painting frescoes on your forehead.

What do a sinking ship and your big forehead head have in common?

Capsize.

Your forehead was so big when you were born, doctors thought you had no face.

How many times have you fallen over and broken your nose because of the gravity created by your forehead?

Your forehead looks like the bottom of a stingray that 4 fishermen are all trying to catch at the same time.

They made a documentary specifically about you. They called it Coneheads.

Don’t worry, the forehead jokes are receding just like your hairline.

I’d say my forehead joke would go over your head but that’s a lot of ground to cover.

That’s not a forehead, that’s a morehead.

Your Forehead Is So Big Jokes

Your forehead is so big, even Dora can’t explore it.

Your forehead is so huge, you wear a bed sheet for a bandana.

Your forehead is so big, it’s like your face started melting.

Your forehead is so big, you could give the entire neighbourhood power by attaching a solar panel to it.

Your forehead is so big, I bet your dreams are in IMAX.

Your forehead is so massive, your left and right ears are in different time zones.

Your forehead is so big, it’s like your entire face is on your chin.

Your forehead is so big, you must use an extra mattress as a pillow.

Your forehead is so big, NASA thought it was a new planet.

Your forehead is so massive, your thoughts start on a Monday and end on Sunday.

Your forehead is so big, you could probably get paid for advertising on that billboard.

Your forehead is so big, the UN passed a bill declaring it a sovereign state.

Your forehead is so huge, it has its gravitational pull.

Your forehead is so big, you have to step into your shirts.

Your forehead is so massive, school teachers use it as a chalkboard.

Your forehead is so big, you could barbecue on it.

Your forehead is so big, your State ID says, “To be continued.”

Your forehead is so big, it makes Kanye West’s ego look small.

Your forehead is so huge, when it rains, your body never gets wet. Ever.

Your forehead is so big, if you had a stroke it would look like a landslide gone wrong.

Your forehead is so big, your mom spent half of the time in the delivery room giving birth to just your head.

Your forehead is so huge, airlines charge you an extra $25 for bringing it aboard.

Your forehead is so prominent, it makes Megamind jealous.

Your forehead is so big, you could paint a target on it and giants could use it as a dartboard.

Your forehead is so big, it looks like a skateboard park.

Your forehead is so big, Goodyear is renting it out.

More Funny Jokes

If you enjoyed getting your head around these hilarious jokes and puns about foreheads, you may also enjoy these other jokes: